Originally Posted by
fed34 
Since she has been out, she has gone to 2-3 meetings a day, works at a law firm, has a sponsor who she has regular contact with and she is doing AWESOME! I am so happy for her, and I am praying so hard for her. She won't have anything to do with me. It breaks my heart. All I ever asked of her was to tell me "Baby, I want help. I want to quit." I told her if she were to ever say those words, people would bend over backward to help. I feel like by using "tough love", I may have lost my "true love". I beg someone to please give me something to go on. I went to al-anon and aa and I have asked for help. My life has become unmanageable, and I have no idea where to turn.
Fed, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. Unfortunately, she'll probably harbor a lot of resentment towards you. Whether or not she gets over it, isn't really the main point. She's hurt you. You can't really "expect" her to come back, even though you did everything right to help her.
At this point, I'd say it's about you. You have to do what's best for you to get better. Addicts don't really understand and it's not our job to make them understand. Maybe one day you will truly be happy for her.
I am going through the same thing you're going through, just an earlier stage. A while back, I came to terms that tough love may cause her to never speak to me again. That's okay. I got strength through the ending scene in the movie "Super" type in youtube and then put this after the dot com. /watch?v=hNDerSVLJIY
You were there in her life for a reason. Maybe the reason is to help her get clean. Try not to want payment for doing this person a kindness. You did the right thing.
Ever go to Al Anon or Nar Anon? Those meetings may help. Good luck to you!