sadielady

So I'm new to the idea of codependency and realizing I was pretty textbook in my relationship with my freshly exABF -- extreme care taking and feeling like I could help him, maybe even save him. I'm awake to that now and working on health for myself, but now I see it showing up other places too.

I have some toxic situations I'm dealing with at work (I'm a manager) and I am recognizing behaviors in myself that I have been justifying as helping others, but in mild to medium sized way are enabling unhealthy work patterns and relationships, essentially avoiding the bigger underlying issues. For example, one mid-level person (I'm upper management) has been grouching a bunch at people and I've been a little soft on her, not clear and direct enough about the unacceptableness of her behavior. Another example, a newer employee has a VERy high sense of entitlement and negative attitude easily, and I have been ineffective at shutting down her flare-ups in front of others. I see in both cases I've taken an approach that didn't draw strong boundaries and expectations, getting caught up too much in feelings.

I just ordered Letting Go and can't wait to read it. I wonder of anyone knows any books that deal directly with codependent feelings and behaviors in te workplace. Now that I'm working on healthier personal relationship skills, I really want to turn this crap around everywhere in my life. It's crazy how I'm seeing things in myself and my patterns I never saw or acknowledged before!!