Wow. Lots of thoughts here, you seem to have quite a bit on your mind.
I would try and simplify things for starters. Sounds like your own drinking habit might be the first hill to climb, and in my experience it's best to start by focusing on that. Leave the husband/house/relationship stuff out of this for now, you will certainly have time to tackle that once you become sober and can see things with a clear head.
I come from a similar drinking situation where I began consuming really large amounts every day/night on a regular basis. It was pretty scary for me, and all of a sudden there were problems with my then-girlfriend, financial issues, employment issues, etc - looming over my head too. It was pretty rough as I had some withdrawl seizures while quitting and went to the ER several times, and then was taken to treatment. It all happened very fast and it was very surreal.
In the beginning it's best to work on stopping this habit. There could be withdrawl issues (do you get night sweats or the shakes ever?), for which a doctor should be consulted. Aside from that, you've got to develop a plan to quit. That starts with reaching out and I'm glad you've done that. Any plans on how to get started?