Ditto to Katiekate. My ex used to say the same things - he was rarely able to emphasize with my choices on how I handled his drunken rampages. He never acknowledged how unsafe it made me and my girls feel. Honestly, I think its denial as well as emotional immaturity. And I've often wondered if the denial really stems from a black out.
One thing I do know is there are times when agreeing to disagree apply, and this is one of those situations. You did the right thing. As a matter of fact, he's damn lucky you didn't stay gone forever, like I did.