Sorry, but you won't know he is serious until he actually starts a program and works the program and his ACTIONS show he is changing.
(((((Kindeyes))))) Gave you the answer. Give him the number of the nearest Salvation Army and allow him to handle it. IF he is accepted, they will send him to the nearest SA that has 'in house' program. KE is correct, it is a very INTENSE program, for 6 to 9 months, but those that stay the course, come out with an excellent set of 'tools' for staying sober and/or clean.
Back when I got sober there were no 'free' in house' rehabs, so I was introduced to AA while I was still in the hospital, recovering from dying in the ER and given some phone numbers for Homes for Alcoholic Women. I found one, they accepted me, and when I left the hospital I went straight there. For the first 2 weeks, my car was parked over to the side and the House Mother had my keys. The rules were simple but quite rigid at first, one 'earned' privileges. One had to attend a minimum of 5 outside AA meetings a week, plus the 3 AA meetings in the house (unless one had a job, one could miss the in house meeting). One had to pay room and board, the first 2 weeks were $50.00 a week and were put on ones books. One also had 1 month to GET A SPONSOR and start USING that sponsor to guide one through the steps of AA.
Then it went to $60.00 a week and one had better be job hunting and find a job to start paying. On top of that we had chores, (they changed each week), house meetings to discuss whatever was bothering us, etc. Now this was 15 women in various stages of recovery from 5 days like myself to 6 months or so, and there were always a 'dispute' or two or three going on, lol It was suggested that one stay at least 90 daysbut longer was good and if one desired, they could then move to one of the one bedroom parents that the House also owned.
AA is always free. I learned in the house in a controlled environment how to start living sober and how to interact with folks without having to be numb. After I left the house I stayed close to the house, still attending those 3 meetings in the house when my job allowed, still helping with 'outside' projects, like a 'yard sale', mini retreats, a style show, etc all to earn money for the house, as Odyssey House (not connected with the chain, they had the name first) was totally funded by donations and what the ladies paid in room and board. It is still in existence 32= years later and is actually 37 years old now. I still send a yearly contribution to them as do many of the 'graduates' from the house.
My point is this, yea I know that I get wordy, rofl that if he is SERIOUS about recovery, then HE will find a rehab and/or a way to acquire the 'tools' that he needs. Give him the phone number of the local Salvation Army and then stand back.
Now how about YOU? Have you tried at least 6 different Alanon meetings to see if you might find one where you feel like you fit a teeny bit, and/or a therapist that specializes in Addiction? It is very hard having a loved one that is an alcoholic/addict and especially if the A is very close to us, such as a spouse or child. It is hard to stand back and not try and 'fix it' (because we can't fix it) but we can 'fix' OURSELVES.
Please keep posting and let us know how your are doing because we do care! And we are walking with you in spirit!
Love and hugs,