i am really not on the attack here. hell, i'm an alcoholic so feel free to disregard my point of view.
my take on this is that mr 'hero' is enjoying the attention. you, in turn, are enjoying the 3-act tragedy of your relationship. this is the epitome of codependence.
i would also add that the verbosity of your posts borders on pomposity. read your posts back in 5 or 10 years and you'll see what people are trying to tell you.