CrimsonKing,
I've realized that we are alcoholics if we feel the need to HAVE to have alcohol and not just enjoy one here and there. I have spent 27 years trying to find a way to drink like everyone else only to fail everytime as I am too far into my addiction. I've just felt the "victim" all these years and that I need alcohol because I can't deal with my issues. But you know, we all can and our lives will never be "free" if we are depending on something and having anxiety and being preoccupied if we don't have the alcohol we feel we need. That's exhausting! Might be exhausting going through the anxious withdrawel phase right now and lack of sleep without having the drinks but in the long run, we are going to have so much more freedom and peace in our lives and life is short, so time to live it! Keep strong and God bless!