For me though I've come to realise that a lot of my animosity towards Them is because I was looking to them to help and support me. Now I just turn to my friends and family and understand that's they are HIS family and whilst I don't have to be their best mate, if I'm with him I do have to accept and be civil to them. Like he has to mine. I just stopped relying on them for emotional support and left his family to him without coming across rude.
Ditto. I wanted them to back me, but they backed him despite all he'd done. Now I'm the bad guy.
It's a reflection of them and their codependency, not of me.
I'm not sure what the work situation is, but if you don't feel comfortable leaving your son with Grandma, don't. If you're just being angry and don't have a real reason not to, don't cut off your nose to spite your face.