Thanks everybody. Yah, I suppose acceptance is part of it and definitely compassion. I just wouldn't have expected I'd feel something that's so noticeably relief so fast. And the guilt is over the idea that I feel better, while I've abandoned him. I'm not doubting the boundary, I just know he has nobody else.
A recovering alcoholic friend told me this is part of the consequence he needs to feel, that he isn't ready and he's going to lose more things in his life, me included. I get that logically, but it's so so sad.
So the relief when it IS so sad is why I feel so guilty.
Thanks for all your words. They help.