Fed Up,
It wasn't strictly my 1st meeting I went to a meeting when I lived in another part of the country about 3 years ago, I was totally anxious and never returned. This time I knew I was ready. I'd read the stickys about meetings and looked at the online Al Anon site, listened to interviews and read what people had to say on here.
One thing that I found really helpful was talking to the people at the Al Anon helpline, they were kind and helpful and gave me the number of the group organiser who was also so kind and caring it reassured me that I would be welcomed. I need help and as far as I can see this is the only place where I can get it.
You'll get there,
Blessings xxx