Hi Melissa, interesting post, I can relate to not dealing with things and running away ive most definitely done that with alcohol. My upbringing was dominated by my fathers constant need to succeed, he started with nothing really and ended up owning a farm, I have equated success to wealth and status, and through my alcoholism of course have achieved neither, the less I achieved the more I drank and the more I drank the less I achieved etc etc.
My mum on the other hand was content having a cup of tea watching her favourite soap opera and didn't share my dads obsession to succeed, I think I have like you got a bit from both, I desperately have wanted to achieve wealth and status thinking this will bring me happiness but then im content somedays just having enough to get by.
A lot of my drinking stems from the fact that I feel that I haven't achieved in the eyes of my father and the frustration of not knowing what exactly I want in life, I want contentment but have never found it.