Thanks guys. This pregnancy has been much calmer than the last. While pregnant with our now 10 month old he left to run off with another woman and like a fool, I asked him to come back. The rest of the pregnancy was full of ups and downs, him cheating, being violent. It was like living in hell. This pregnancy, we have been seperated since before I found out I was pregnant. Through the heartache and court battle, the last few months have been suprisingly peaceful and almost happy without him. I am thinking that hormones are playing a big part in how I am feeling about the birth and hopefully the heartache will go away completely after baby is here. Its funny, I know I don't want him back, really the thought of even seeing him disgusts me. The birth is just hitting me for some reason.