thanks for all the insight and positivity and yes, even the tough love from nighthawk. Sometimes a kick in the ass is needed as much as a kind words. today i'm one week sober. used the money i'm saving from skipping booze to join a gym and start getting back into shape. stomach cramps are starting to subside. i was in a world of hurt for a little but i must say visiting my family this weekend, having them see me happy and sober, out weighs the whiskey without a question. Here to stay, here to fight for my life back.