COD-
When it comes down to it, I think the question I would ask myself is, "Are you ready to leave now? Are you done with chances?" I think that by the time we consulting an attorney you are ready to have you marriage over. My feeling is that you would be able to testify to all the times you spoke with her about changing your families situation and her role in it and that would be just as convincing as a letter you wrote. Just my opinion though.
4MyBoys