The fact that before I ever planned anything for myself I needed to check with my Scheduling Manager (the ex) first, contributed significantly to my drinking behavior. It was the only "me" time that I could reliably have. If I was drunk, I didn't have to go out in the world and do what she wanted. I had a lot of resentment toward her in that regard.
Be careful with trying to be everything for everybody right now. I am sure you are aware of what building resentment can do to your recovery. I think it is okay and necessary to say "no" when you need to. I also understand how you feel like you are bent over a barrel by everyone's requests, hence your Pulp Fiction quote.
I'll exit with this:
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know My name is the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon thee."