Boon--seriously, it has been only three weeks since the **** hit the fan (if I understand correctly). The pain will be fresh for several weeks and will fade considerable in a few m onths. It will tend to come and go --like in waves. Each wave lasting less long and getting farther apart as time goes o n. This is the typical pattern for a major heart-break.
It can't be gone overnight--but it won't last forever! It should be past history next year.
You are doing exactly what you should do--alanon, therapy***, talking it out with others.....and pushing yourself to go about your daily life chores.
You will have a excavating job to do concerning your past life experiences--especially childhood ones--that left you so vulnerable to a guy who would only throw crumbs your way. Really, as Honeypig said--you have been alone more time than you realized.
You are stronger than you think. You will get through this---with therapy and alanon and reading (educating) yourself--I absolutely know you can emerge from this time
happy and whole. Never again to live on the "crumb diet"
dandylion