Thanks for those replies, you guys are the best. Guess I'm just feeling sorry for myself a bit. My emotions are all over the highway. I did just have a friend I haven't talked to in a few years call-that was great. The sad part of it though, I was going through this very same scenario the last time we talked. Man, do I need to get off the crazy train or what??
As far as the BPD, she had been to a few doctors, trying to figure it out, hence the Xanax at one time. I'm not a 100% sure, but her mother was Bi-polar, and she exhibits much of those traits as well. Its probably an overlapping of different disorders with the alcohol. Yeah, I hear you; vanilla, cooking sherry, rubbing alcohol, mouthwash, seen it all.