I had decided to give a year of living sobriety before making any decisions, and now the year is up.....
I think you know what you must do, but you are not ready right now to do it.
That is perfectly OK. Take the time you need, unless of course there is violence involved.
Sometimes I wish for what I cannot get- a husband who is emotionally attached, able to discuss his recovery issues and who will apologise for all the crap over the years!
My experience with my second ex husband was something like this. He went back to drinking after both of us went to a six week in patient rehab.
He could not have a real emotional attachment to me because that would take a lot of work for both of us.
And, he would have to be sober. He was unwilling to do that, he decided that I was the one with the problem, and he could "control" his drinking.
he likes to engage me in these little games- asking my advice, and then implying I am controlling; or disagreeing with every little thing I say, with a wry smile on his face
Wow! This is
exactly what my ex was doing. Little mind games. And that little smirk on all the time.
Always wanting to know my exact whereabouts, and even if I was at work, he wondered who I was "fooling around with."
Turns out,
he was the cheater.
I was still sober, and he went back to drinking right away,
he wanted me to "change back" to being a submissive drunk.
That was
never going to happen to me again.
Your dedication to Al Anon should keep you on track.
It might not feel like it, but you are becoming
aware.
Next is
acceptance.
Then there is
action.
You are making great progress and I think the mind games are to get you off track.
Do not "change back", always forward.
Keep up the good work, and come here to ramble anytime.
When I share with you, it helps me.
Amazing how it works.
Beth