Oh, and I forgot one more important thing.
I forgot about self-pity that goes hand in hand with addiction and AV.
I remember back in my wining days it all often started with "ole poor me I deserve a glass of wine".
Then it was "ole poor me I deserve cakes/cookies.
Self-pity is AV's best friend. It often puts a mask of love and care, but it has nothing to do with it.
Love to myself, care for myself, accepting my trues wishes has nothing to do with it.
Self-pity is destructive, leads nowhere, makes me weak and convinces I am helpless and hopeless. And all this is just total BS.
Bottomline - Badass Midnight doesn't need this pathetic self-pity. Let's leave it to AV.