It's hard to not have a supportive spouse when getting sober, but maybe when he sees your sobriety will not affect his choice to drink he will not mind as much. Just for the record though, non-alcoholics and/or sober folks will accept you whether you drink with them or not - only us drunks have the fear that we are boring etc. if not drunk.
Having booze in the house is bad for you though - you need help ASAP, or you will drink. It seems you have already admitted your powerlessness over alcohol and that your life has become unmanageable - which is step 1 - you're on the way!
If you can parlay that admission into action you have a chance to stay sober today. Find an AA meeting and stay for the whole thing. Find a woman there who you can talk to and just tell her what you are dealing with. If your spouse is an alcoholic he may work against you, fearing his addiction is in jeopardy, but he'll get over that. Do it for YOU, then you can be the mom you want to be. Find a meeting! God bless.