I know how you feel because he should be there helping you like my separated AH should be by my side. I deserve peace and to be cared for while I am ill with this cancer. I get so mad when i think about what he "should" be doing and the said thing is AnonK, it is our expectations which are hurting us.
Honey, like me...you have to remove him from your support system. Hes already showing you he cannot be there for you. He may want to be but not capable right now so dont depend on him. I know it hurts and you deserve better but the reality is, he is not the man you need now. This is so painful and that is why you are here on the forum.
We are here to support you. We all have walked or are walking this walking it now. Value yourself...you deserve better and you really need to believe it yourself.