I'm 6 months + sober and I am in AA.
I want to scream and rebel right now. I am absolutely and totally fed up with this whole "ego deflation" thing that I have to do.
(Notice how I start every sentence with "I".)
Why are there no answers to how unfair life is? Why must I be stuck doing jobs I hate when many of the people I used to know don't have to (rich parents)?
My sponsor tells me I am like that "retired businessman, lulling about in the Florida sunshine complaining about the sad state of affairs."
That may be so, but my coping skills/resources are pretty ********ing exhausted and 5-6 times a day I find myself just wishing it could all end. All of it. My life has been like this for years and now in sobriety I really don't feel better about life's "unfairness aspect".
I don't want to do any more of this ego deflation stuff. Is there no relief?
