Being aware is the first part of recovery (for me).
Awareness that your mother cannot be what you need is tough and that sucks.
Next, is acceptance.
I am learning that acceptance is my key to serenity.
It is so trite and simplistic, but it is what it is.
I found my calendar with beautiful flowers and hung it up today.
The theme of the calendar is Zen.
This month, the very flower you use as an avatar (anemone?)sp? is the flower of the month.
A big, square picture of blue flowers with the word "clarity" in white script on the lower right hand corner.
Today, I search for clarity.
I hope you find some peace with your awareness.
Beth