Full of fear :(
I have been very stressed out lately. And today I ended a relationship. I am sad and full of fear and I imagine it's coming from my internal battle. I cried on and off all day ...had to take mini breaks at work to cry in my car. I went to a meeting tonight and blubbered the whole time. I just couldn't stop crying.
I had a panic attack today and every time I try to eat I get a sharp stabbing pain in my throat. Now my already exhausted mind is wandering and I am thinking "must be throat cancer".
My AV wanted to drink after work. To not feel sad, to numb this fear. I chose instead to do the next right thing and get to a meeting. I don't like being afraid and I just wanted to reach out so I am not alone. Thank you for reading...I hope my next post can be a positive one :/