I made sure I didn't have work and there were other people in the house, because like you I didn't know how taking so many Imodium would make me feel - it didn't have much of an effect on my tummy at all, but really took away the chills and awful leg twitches.
You aren't weak or a disgrace, these drugs are bigger than us - you are amazing for recognising it and being determined to stop. When I stopped I made sure I would run out and have no access to more for a few days - otherwise I would have taken one to stop the flu-feeling. If it's not in the house you can't though.
What is your next plan xxx