Thank God for the 9th step. It helped me to accept the part I played in situations and make amends to the best of my ability. The longer you stay clean, the more you will understand the amends process. Someone else said that the best thing you can do for your friend is to stay clean. You can be that vision of hope that she may need to light the spark of desire. And that is the only requirement for membership in our fellowship.
I introduced my first two "baby mama's" to heroin. When I got clean I had all of the same guilt and shame about what their lives might have been like if they had not met me! My sponsor helped me to see that I was not responsible for their disease. He told me that I was not that powerful. That I did not have the power to cause or stop anybody's addiction. They alwyas have a choice.
My oldest daughter's mother now has 7 years clean after doing 3 years in Clinton (women's prison), my 16 year old's mother died two years ago as a direct result of her choice to continue using. All I did was continue not to use and take care of my girls. When they asked for help, I was able to point them in the right direction. My heart is clear...