Hi and congratulations on your sober time
I had to let go of my old crowd too, most of whom were drinking buddies and fairly easy to drop, but there were 1 or 2 special people who I still miss very much. I'm still in contact with them, and have been to see them once or twice. Our friendship ran a lot deeper than just drinking together but by taking out the big ingredient of alcohol things fundamentally changed between us. Mostly for them I'm thinking, because I moved the goalposts. They miss the old me, the one who was loud and outrageous and fun to be with. Now I'm more quiet and reserved and we can't connect like we once did. But, with time, I see that those 'fun' times all too often led me to anxiety and shame. Danger too.
Is there a chance you could be looking back with 'rosé coloured glasses' at those times?
I'm re-connecting with old friends now, the ones I left behind in my need to get drunk. The ones who tried to drink alongside me but who knew when to stop when I didn't. The ones who gently suggested my lifestyle was getting out of hand and so I purposefully dropped because I didn't want to hear what they had to say.
It sounds like you need to start actively building a new sober life instead of looking back. Look at things in your life that you enjoy doing and do them more. Take up a new hobby or sport. New friends appear in places you least expect them to sometimes.
Thankyou for your post. Good to have you with us x