Genie

I have a similar thread in the Alcoholism forum, but, I am seeking secular help and am not interested in AA since I do not agree with step 1 and 2. I have read Rational Recovery and know all about AVRT.

Here I am back on Day 4. Someone sent me a picture of myself and I couldn't believe who that creature was in the picture. Two years ago I was sober, I was fit, and feeling fantastic.

I just got back from my doctor and it's not great news. My BP is high - he's worried. I am getting bloodwork done - wonder what that will reveal. I am 30 pounds overweight.

I start a new job next week. I had to go and buy a few new clothes because nothing in my closet fits me anymore.

I don't know what the hell happened, but, I guess this Genie has to stop going into her bottle.

At this moment, I am unable to make a Big Plan and will be going 1 day at a time and hope to gain strength with each passing day. Right now, my health is a big concern and a huge motivator - being highly competitive I hope to use that to my advantage.

The long road back - I am hoping I make it this time. Going to spend a lot of time here on SR - do some reading, reflecting and healing

I'd welcome any suggestions. Thanks.
Genie