Yes after looking after myself and feeling totally serene over the past couple of days what did I do ? Go poking around not minding my own business and looking at pics of STBXAH smiling at gf - I brought it on myself and now I can't eat - for the first time in ages I am completely obsessing about him . I have an attack of low self esteem and just feel like I'm in hell. And yet I know, the facts speak for themselves - he is a very sick man and his life is in freefall - he is totally ignoring all financial responsibilities and I would say well - 'stealing' from me. There is no other way I can think of putting it. I know the chances of recovery for an A who just white knuckles it are slim if they dont work the steps - I tell myself these things but I am still obsessing. I am sick of feeling like this , I know I am missing out on better things and sitting with my feelings is just torchure, though I know the only way out of the pain is thru the pain.
