Thanks for all the great welcome messages and support.
Last nights sleep was not too great but i've been up and about today and filled the cupboards with healthy food. Not too shaky or sweaty.
I've also told my friends that I will be not drinking at social events.
A little about me...I'm 29 guy from the UK
Been a heavy drinker since I was about 15. I went through a medical detox when I was 26ish but as I was prescribed benzo's for a long time I managed to convince most people and myself that was the reason I needed the detox....erk
Around that time I got with my girlfriend and became a secret drinker, openly drinking social amounts but hiding vodka everywhere... what had before been heavy beer drinking became vodka binges.
The past six months have been a cycle of vodka binges and panic trying to detox myself without people noticing.... most of which has been passed off as my 'mental problems'.
This last binge was the icing on the cake and im determined to never touch alcohol again. I made the mistake of visiting my dad for a week who i've not seen in years who is an alcoholic...and now not even half a man..we both drank and i was so upset I continued drinking in secret when I returned... locked myself in the spare room telling my partner i was depressed. Then the usual... no memories of conversations, jerks that can't be hidden and so I've been tappering since then... about a week.
The height of it was about 2l of vodka over 24hrs. I know it was incredibly dangerous. Stupid...And the pain my stomach was in from lack of food....
Then the tapering... the anxiety, lack of sleep thinking I was never going to wake up if I go to sleep. I know I should of gone to hospital, but despite the secret drinking I can't for other reasons I may go into another day!
Anyway this lil about me is rather long!!! sorry
Here's to day two!