Yes I've been there many times and the booze usually won. What started to make a difference and make the struggle simpler were things like halt, kiss and the serenity prayer. In time these events (with a whole lot of other tools) became rare. Sometimes the urge still blinks (like a bubble rising) but go straight to things like gratitude. It's no longer a struggle but a gift. but not one I take for granted. one day et.c.