Thanks hammer, I appreciate the feedback, because this has been a throbbing stresser, certainly these past few weeks, but actually for the past few months ever since this man came into my life.
He is married/separated. He is in the process of a divorce. The mutual friend who introduced us knows him and his estranged wife well for over a decade.
Staying away from crazy people is mighty hard, we're everywhere!
I keep telling myself that I should have seen it coming, I should have done this, or NOT done that etc etc. and now the mutual friend is blaming me for leading him on, for breaking his heart, saying I should be slapped around for my behavior. Meanwhile I am trying to rebuild a life with a new partner...
and it's just life. A highway pileup of feelings and situations and dreams and dramas, and people colliding head on when they are going in completely opposite directions.
I'm just hoping him and his gun don't take a 2000 mile detour on the way to divorce court.