I feel like a broken record as I have said this so often on this site. It seems like the only thing I have to say these days but there are so many situations where it seems to fit. When you fall of you have to get back on as D-boy said. I was clean for 10 years and one pill got me going again. I slid down hill for 3 years before I was able to get my head out of my rear end and now I am back at a year.
I'm glad to be here at a year but know in my heart that it means nothing really. Sobriety is so fragile and can be so hard. Using seems a lot easier and the "rewards" are immediate.
Suck it up and start again. The alternatives are not pretty. You are not alone in being an addict and most certainly are not alone in relapsing and spinning out of control.