The 1st step in al-anon
We admitted we were powerless over alcohol (and the alcoholic) and that our lives had become unmanageable.
We learn to walk on egg shells so we don’t upset them more. We jump through hoops believing that if we please them today life will go smoothly tomorrow. And then they change the game plan and those things we tried in the past that brought us a little relief don’t work for us today.
Without even realizing it, we have taught the alcoholic how to treat us. We’ve shown them exactly what we will put up with. He knows he can push your mom around and there are no consequences in fact he’s rewarded for it, she buys him beer or he gets money. Just like there were no consequences for assaulting you.
When you have called the police in the past – what was your purpose in doing that? Was it to have them calm him down? Did you want them to tell him he needs to treat you and your mother better? What were you expecting the police to do if you weren’t willing to press any charges?
If you can’t get your mother to attend al-anon or seek counseling then you need to do it for yourself!!!