thanks for the advice. Stiney just to clarify i can leave and will if he doesn't move out but kids are really little and they are in a routine so it is easier for him to leave than 5 of us. Plus if I leave right now I would have to pull my oldest out of school. Which really is not an option. I hate to say this but I am just numb. This last event I didn't even really get mad. I didn't yell, when he comes over we are fine in front of the kids (they need to see him too). I just feel like we are two people living in the same house and we don't even really like each other. I know drinking is a sickness but when you have kids they come first and they always will. I really feel like everything that has happened this year I have not had time to deal with. I have pushed everything to the side to take care of my kids. Is it too much for him to help me and take care of me? I am also angry becuase his parents say I need to be supportive of him. But what about me. I have had to deal with this for years. Where is my support. I am going to talk to a lawyer tomorrow so I guess my mind is really already made up. It just hurts and is stressful.