Gunther
Take the advice on here. I've lost my marriage, family, friends, money and work through my addictions. It's a lonely place down here. If you still have a structure in place and can rescue what you have, grab it with both hands. I wish I had while I had that chance.
If you don't, do what I'm doing. Get all the help you can, listen to the advice of those who have managed to find and keep sobriety and get serious about staying clean. Pick yourself up and do the work. Do whatever it takes as there is no alternative.
All strength friend.
NT