Hi Patty,
I don't know much about your situation but your ex sounds like the horrible/sick person. Why would she take you to court for custody of your kids, lose, and then refuse to see them when you offer? This doesn't make any sense at all to me.
I think what people are reacting to is the idea of the kids being used as pawns in your relationship with your ex. I'm not saying this is happening because I don't fully understand the situation, but your post kind of made it sound that way.
Of course you need support, and I hope you get it here. It sounds like going on the cruise alone with your kids is a great idea.
Hugs.