Well, it seems to be helping. I filled out a number of exercises, and did some readings she'd given me.
I also managed to go to a local coffee shop, and turn out three new poems, all of which I felt were pretty strong, even in early drafts. I have not had such a burst of creative energy in some time. The coffee shop is a good place to go to write free of the distraction of the computer at home; I tend to write 99% of my early drafts longhand, then go to Word. But it hasn't proved to be a very social setting...sadly, like so many coffee shops, it's mainly a sea of laptops and tablets. Out of maybe 20 people, I think I was the only one with pen and paper, or a book, and there wasn't much conversation. I did ask the person working about setting up events, as in a poetry night, and she seemed enthusiastic, and passed along the name of the owners. It's a very cozy place, just a few blocks away.
So then I called my folks, as I had an aunt who just killed herself, and now, her husband is very ill, as in not much time to go, my dad's only brother. Talked a few hours.
And then, I felt this enormous need to share what I had written, and talked about with somebody, and ended up going to that familiar tavern...and I tried not to drink, and had some very engaging conversations about those peoms, music, art, literature...though I did break down and have a few beers, not enough to get drunk, but a bit tipsy, and I felt a bit guilty about it all.
But it seemed to tell me something: I need a social outlet that has some physical constancy about it, where I can have such conversations, or it seems I start to go crazy. And it's hard to go there, and not drink, but yet it;'s a kind of hub of culture/counter-culture, and it's SO hard not to go, and just not drink.
So maybe if I form a poetry group, it will help...I've looked on meet-up, but I have not seen much near me...which seems weird, living in the 'arts district'.
Anyway, I am doing better. Not perfect, but better; didn't drink on all the other days, and feel a lot more clear-headed.