Need to heal
I am at crossroads, for what seems to be the umpteenth time I have tried to give up alcohol in vain. I have stayed sober for different time tperiods (2 years at one point) but this never seems to last. I started drinking at the tender age of 12, alcohol has been part of my life for as long as I can remember as well as a key struggle for generations of my family. I have attempted suicide twice because of the associated struggles but was saved on both occassions. I lost interest in many things in life including eating healthy and exercise and have put on quite some weight.
Right now I feel helpless, the only thing keeping me going is my job but I am not 100% effective because I miss days due to getting drunk the previous night or the depression. Pray for me and help me realise that this can be done. I plan to go for my first AA meeting tomorrow.