nod,
Are you in a recovery program, such as AA? I'm sober four and a half years in AA, and it has really changed my life. At one week sober, your emotions are all over the place--I remember it well. Working a recovery program can help put all the pieces into place--all the pieces that didn't fit before. There are never any guarantees that sobriety will save a marriage or a relationship, but drinking is guaranteed to destroy it. If you nurture your sobriety, you WILL smile again with real joy, I can promise you that.