Welcome Krysti!
I am 24 and have been sober for 28 days!
I have been drinking since I was young and alcoholism runs rapid throughout both sides of my biological parents side.
I never believed in getting help for that was a sign of weakness however, the only weakness that I was proving was not seeking help.
I am soon to be in a program that is very close to my heart; Celebrate Recovery. My church is starting up this program that is why it is very close.
I do not enjoy AA meetings due to the fact that I get high anxiety in a room full of people I do not know. That is why I quit every time and pride. I believed that I was not in that rough of shape as everyone else was that was sitting in that AA meeting. Honestly, looking back now though I do not know their stories, I was probably worse; I know I was, I refused to help myself.
What I have learned is this: If I am not willing to accept that I am an alcoholic and I am not willing to accept the fact that I DO need help; I am just failing myself.
Recovery is not weakness; it is finding new strength in yourself. The only person who can help you, is you!
SR (Sober Recovery) has helped me in so many aspects and even improving my thoughts about myself, but I know I can not just allow SR to be just my only support.
Being sober, I have found newness in life that I have never experienced from the bottom of a bottle. I find myself laughing and actually believing that I actually can have goodness in my life.
The same goes for you. You are still here and you are not what this disease makes you believe who you are: worthless, useless, out of control, friendless, unlovable, horrible, ugly, disgusting, undesirable; deserve to be trapped in a hole, buried, and left there to starve, decay and be forgotten by the world.
This you are not!
You are ALIVE, worthy, strong, successful, loveable, beautiful, cherished, desirable, changed, accepted.
Your strongest thought becomes reality; even the underlying ones that you are not even aware of will do so. In this way, you become what you think. By coming here, you have already taken steps ahead in changing your reality however, that is not enough. Now is the time to take ACTION. And the most beneficial action you can take is to become aware about yourself and your thought patterns.
You are not responsible for your first thought, but you are responsible for your next action.
Take the step, be bold, and be brave!
Once again, thank you for stopping by SR and welcome!