WoW! You know I relate to what Andy said here most. I am a new comer. I do inderstand that there are pros that are really broken & peps that will take advantage of this, but victim? Takes 2 to play the game in or out of recovery! Here's the deal. I am a 46 yr. Old woman, new to recovery yes, but I've been a woman my whole dang life! In life, everyday I face challenges & adversity. It's how the program I live gives me the tools to deal with these things that make the difference. If I lose the want/need to use the tools, then i may be in trouble. I am now seeing an 'old timer' 21yrs clean! I knew there was a chance we'd run into disapproval, but I had know idea MY fine group of people would honesty brand us with a scarlet letter & seem to want to hang him! The judgment from others affect my recovery way more then the 13 stepping! And I sit and think "no wonder relationships inside the program usally don't work!" It may just be the bs from the program! I kinda feel like I have to go to the streets if I want to persue any romantic relationship! Ive been out there, I say no thanks! Come on! Nothing changes if nothing changes. I love that i have s relationship with someone I can share my new way of life with! Someone that understands it. I was honestly going to go out and 13 step on my damn own if he decided he couldnt do it. A victim I'm not, not of him anyway! So It's not for everyone & itd something to pray about for sure. But to spit all the glares & gossip, I continue to walk onto that room with my head high, because it is MY program. Please continue to keep caring, but also BE careful, as just maybe by trying to protect we end up hurting even more.
