Actually I am doing pretty good, I am making a ton of progress in my adjusted boundaries with my family and friends.
This court date has been all that keyed up thinking about my brother. Oh, that and having to move his stuff around in the basement yesterday to accomodate some new workout gear. I was thinking "I wonder if he is going to prison and I can put these tubs in the back of the crawl space", lol. I can honestly say I have done pretty good with the no contact and not wasting energy worrying about him (until yesterday/today).
It feels more weird NOT worrying about my family like I was.
My sis is struggling with her 18 month marriage, and in the past I would have had my nose all up in that problem. This time, I had a recommendation for a therapist from my therapist, I passed that on and I answered a couple of her questions, but thats IT. I invited her and my mom to go hiking with me and my husband this weekend, but I didn't bring up her issues at all or offer gobs of advice like I used to. I just wanted to enjoy a hike with everyone and for a change thats all we did.
My young bro taking the test, I passed on a "good luck" note, but that was it. No advice, no fretting over his success, just Hi and I am proud of you. Thats huge for me, I used to be the queen of unsolicited advice.
My dad is in a new job. He tried to get me to help him do his new website for the job and I did VERY good at redirecting him to coworkers or to solving it himself rather then trying to dump it on me (I am like IT support to him sometimes). HUGE for me.
My husband is wanting to do some new workouts and diet plans, and since I am the homemaker with the free time, I have no problems helping him to some degree (like packing him a lunch and adjusting dinners to what he wants), but I made it clear that this was HIS change, and while I would help him he needed to own it. There have been times where I owned things like this WAY too much for him, which in turn came back to bite me in the arse.
So ME, I am doing better.
My only real difficulty is working on finding myself more. Not using everyone else to spend time and energy on puts things back on ME. What do I want? Who am I? What is my identity?
That is more what I am working on now, which seems as daunting as letting go was previously, lol
