Aqua ~ Of course it all seems too much right now...no end to the pain. But there is. Make the decision to put the alcohol down, and the rest will follow.
No matter what is going on in your office, no matter how difficult these people are, you cannot handle this until you get sober. That's it. That's the first step.
Then you can go to AA or not; as Sugar said, there are a lot of different ways of staying stopped.
We are all here for you, supporting you. You CAN do this!
Love Venus xx