Hi Open Sky, I can certainly relate to your geographical situation, if not the family dynamics as I used to live in a small country town in WA. I also went through a terrible time, not related to abuse, that ended my marriage. I did have some help from the local GP who knew of some resources, and i saw a psychologist in Perth every fortnight. Another resource that people often forget is their local MP. I went to a meeting with one, once and she said her staff had the phone numbers of almost everyone in the public service who could get things done for her constituents. I'm sure there will be programs your husband could follow just as you visited Holyoake, but if he isn't willing, then you will have to set your boundaries. Your children are old enough to make their own decisions so for instance if you felt the need to leave the table you could do it on your own, and they could follow if they want to. Possibly explain your boundary to them in advance. I'm thinking of you because I know the dynamics of small towns and in some ways it's harder than in the anonymous city.