I had your same fear bigaquagirl. The stigma of being labelled an alcoholic, or of other people finding out kept me drinking for a long time. Meanwhile, the negative consequences kept piling up.
AA is anonymous for a reason. Nobody in your office will find out and even if they do, chances are they would be proud of you for seeking treatment for your disease. The reality is that they probably already suspect something is up. You can't be fired for being in recovery, but you can easily lose your job if you continue.
Please get the help you need. AA has given me tremendous strength.
If you are seriously contemplating suicide, you need to reach out for help now.