I need help, any kind word or gesture can help me out right now. Im 24 years old and I live in Florida, about a year ago I met the LOVE of my LIFE in my english class. We started off 4 months becoming the best of friends, he fell madly in love with me, and i too began to fall in love with him. Our chemistry was AMAZING, we would finish each others sentences. About 4 months into our relationship i found some things were super sketchy about him like he would cancel plans with me, show up late....all to add up that he was an EX heroin addict of 7 years......He decides to tell me now after its TOO LATE to walk away or run for the hills....so yes i decided to stay with him and help him get the help he needed for proper recovery.....if only i would listen to my brain and not my heart i should of known that i cant help him, he has to want to help himself! now after some time and he would tell me to my face he is getting better, i believed him. he even convinced me that he was OK to drink alcohol but i didnt know any better, i have never been in a situation like this before in my life...so we would go out for drinks......then i found out he would lie behind my back and get HAMMERED by himself without me there....so many times he told me was in bed or "still working" but he was getting *********......we were suppose to be moving in together to a nice townhouse last month but it never happened because he wrote a check from a closed bank account, he didnt want to hurt my feelings and tell me he wasnt ready......we broke up last week and im a EMOTIONAL wreck. I cant eat or do anything i even quit my job because i cant do much of anything.....i feel as if im empty......the life has been sucked out of me..i know he loves me unconditionally.....but he thinks its best if he takes his space.......i dont know if he plans on using again? he told me he doesnt plan on using again and that hes going 4 help and he doesnt want 2 hurt me anymore......he thinks i deserve better....but he is a good person deep down.....i dont know what i should do......do i wait? i feel as if tables were turned he would wait for me.......i love him so much......hes my soulmate
i feel like im dying inside.....help.....Ill never love another person the way I loved him......and i know he loves me so much he just feels hes not capable of ever being the man i dserve.....im so hurt....please help