I loosely use avrt as well. I am going on 60 days sober. I found it much simpler to understand and for me to accept. I ordered the rational recovery book and I'm just beginning to read it. When it comes down to it I think it is whatever clicks with you. Have your panic attacks been better since quitting? Mine got worse the 1st month but seem to be getting better now. I'm still not entirely sure if my panic attacks are all alcohol related. Congrats on your 19 days. That is awesome!