Some of my not-so-long-ago posts describe the HELL I was in after a similar incident. Also describes my TREK back out of HELL. I was Black & Blue & Bloody (in spirit), I felt like people were spitting on me and railing accusations at me, and my self-induced loathing was even worse. But I was NOT DEAD yet! I stood upright and started that trek back out of HELL. Demons were ripping at my flesh, but I continued on. I heard people shouting encouragement in the distance...I think you may have been one of those voices...That Saved My Life!
Listen to us calling you back out of the pit of HELL. Follow our voices. We want to see you in the sunlight again...soon.