How to deal with my feelings of NC at Easter
As most of you know, this has been a real struggle for me...maintaining no contact. This week has been very hard - my court date was postponed for a month, I had to let my babysitter go for passing info to my XAGF, and my ex seens to absolutely hate me for keeping the kids from her at easter. I am having a really hard time today. I want to contact her and see her this weekend. I know I can't. I know if i was able to contact her (she has me blocked) she would never agree to meet just me, only if my kids were involved...ie. she would use the situation to see them, I am just an inconvenience to be dealt with. I have no reason to believe she has stopped drinking or any of the other things that I don't want in my life. It makes NO SENSE for me to break NC when i just let my babysitter go for essentially the same thing. Please...help. Remind me that this is what's best. Letting go is so hard. i keep reminding myself that as bad as I feel knowing how much she misses them, SHE CHOSE THIS. She decided to go to court and break off our relationship. She made this move. It makes NO SENSE for me to pay a lawyer $350/hr and then let her see them just so i can get my needs met to see her.